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Self-Indulgence Finale (?) – Kill It (?)

October 9, 2016

A few days ago, over on that there Twitter thing, I mentioned that I’d be shutting down Mecha-Guignol sometime in the near future. I haven’t posted here since last year, when I wrote about the Fast and the Furious series. For a year or so before that I was pretty spotty with my writing. Updatedude’s done a little writing in the meantime, but his output’s waned as well.

This joint’s effectively dead. It still gets hits, and it still gets the occasional angry kid commenting about how I’m fucking stupid for not liking Kamina or Naruto or Goku,  but it’s all like unto necrophilia. It’s awesome that Mecha-Guignol still gets a modicum of attention, but it just gets more and more morbid with each passing hit.

It just doesn’t feel right that this place still exists. It’s unnatural, man.

It isn’t because I’ve suddenly stopped writing. The desire to write burns even stronger in my twisted soul, but circumstances keep me from being able to indulge. I do post short little movie reviews over on Letterboxd, but that’s just yet another stopgap, much like how MG started off as one back in the day. I just wanted someplace to help get my groove back as far as writing goes, and that turned into this blog thing and became my writing for a few years.

I just don’t have the same time and energy as I used to. My job has become more and more hectic– I’ve somehow managed to gain more responsibilities without getting a proper promotion or raise or anything to make it worthwhile– mostly due to cutbacks and shit. I used to be able to go to this place, do my hours, get out, go home, and indulge in watching and writing about all this good stuff. Now, more often than not, I’m having to deal with work-related things outside of work hours, or I’m just mentally tired and zone out to Hearthstone and conspiracy radio.

On top of that, I’ve made new friends. I know, the horror! We should all be so cursed. My gaming group (which had dwindled to two dudes other than me) has been assimilated by another group of friends, and I do the table top gaming thing more now than I have at any point in my life. It used to be I was lucky to get one night in a week, and nowadays two nights a week is kind of the norm. Add on top of that the fact that I’ve gotten kinda close with one of my co-workers over the past year and a half, and me and her hang out and talk and, like, go places and stuff when we have the chance. Don’t read too much into that last statement.

So yeah, work sucks (and sucks my soul). I have something resembling a social life. When I get that alone time, anime just ain’t what’s on my mind. I could have easily shifted gears to writing about gaming and movies, but that never really felt right here. I know a few peeps were into me writing about that sort of thing, but those posts were easily my least-read. I may not be an anime guy deep down, but that’s how I grew this blog’s, and to force it to be anything else just wouldn’t be right.

Mecha-Guignol feels like something from another life, and in order to get on with things I feel like I gotta shed its weight. Knowing that it’s still out there, lingering around like a dying animal or something, kinda nags on me. At the same time, putting it down is, like, final. There’s nothing here that I’m not proud of or ashamed of. It’s not like I feel like someone’s gonna come across this joint and use something against me. It’ll just make me feel better if it ceases to exist as-is.

Which is to say, if and when I do take it down, I’ll be sure to preserve it. Download my writing. Maybe stash it away somewhere, I don’t know. I do plan on starting some other project at some point in the future. I’d definitely stash away my Top 50 list and a few other things there. Again, I don’t know. There are pieces worth saving, but the corpse needs to go.

Or maybe I won’t do any of that. Maybe I’ll just let it linger. It ain’t doing anyone harm. We’ll see. Maybe I just needed to get this shit off my chest and Mecha-Guignol’ll keep on keeping on regardless of new stuff being posted.

Or maybe I’ll just start writing here again. Maybe I’ll delete a whole bunch of old shit to do said shedding and keep this place– all reborn and whatever. Maybe I won’t.

Hell if I know what’s gonna happen.

One Comment leave one →
  1. October 12, 2016 10:16 AM

    I came across your blog a long time, I think it was your top 50 list. It really stood out to me because there was no Gintama, Mushishi, no Guuren Laggan, no Code Geass, etc. I started reading more and more of your blog posts, and I really vibed with the stuff you were saying. You seemed to enjoy pissing off anime fans, without compromising your opinions and thoughts. At first I thought of your blog as a more “mature” anime watcher thing, but that would be a laughable statement considering you have samurai pizza cats in your top 50 list. Nonetheless, I really did enjoy reading through most of your posts, I’d like to think my taste in movies/animes was somewhat shaped by your blog. I’m happy to hear that your life is moving forward, despite whatever hardships you might have at work.

    Thanks for all your writing, I hope you succeed well in life!

    Take care Landon

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